Lightning Fill In The Blank

Feb 7, 2014
Originally published on February 8, 2014 10:17 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points. Carl, can you give us the scores?

CARL KASELL: Roxanne Roberts has the lead, Peter. She has four points. Tom Bodett and Paula Poundstone are tied for second. Each has two.

SAGAL: We have flipped a coin and Paula has elected to go second. That means, Tom, you're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday the Department of Homeland Security warned that terrorists may try to smuggle explosives onto Olympic bound planes in blank.

TOM BODETT: Toothpaste tubes.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Although it plunged by over 300 points on Monday, the blank rebounded on Tuesday.

BODETT: The stock market.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Republicans in the Senate successfully filibustered a bill to extend blank benefits.

BODETT: The unemployment benefits.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After a leaked phone call appeared online Thursday, Russia accused the U-S of assisting the protestors in blank.

BODETT: Ukraine.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Their commercial featuring America the Beautiful sung in different languages caused some angry viewers to swear that they would never drink blank again.

BODETT: Coca Cola.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A judge in Missouri ruled Monday that it is not illegal for drivers to blank to warn other drivers of an upcoming speed trap.

BODETT: The flash the lights.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in Pennsylvania attempted to rob...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...a Hallmark store by blanking.

BODETT: Pretending to be like the Easter bunny - the Easter chicken.

(LAUGHTER)

BODETT: You know, I don't know.

SAGAL: You know.

(LAUGHTER)

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Didn't he...

SAGAL: What he did appropriately was that he gave the cashier a greeting card - a very nice card, you open it up, handwritten message, give me all the money or I will kill you.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Police say he would've had a better chance with "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Give Me All the Money or I Shoot You."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: As it was, the woman said, no, and he left the store and was arrested.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Tom do?

KASELL: Tom had six correct answers for 12 more points. He now has 14 points and Tom has the lead.

SAGAL: All right. Very good, Tom.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Paula, you're up next. Fill in the blank. Almost a million people were left without power in the Northeast on Wednesday, after the area was hit with another blank.

POUNDSTONE: Snow storm.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Although the CDC said Wednesday that it was safe, some doctors are still advising residents not to drink the water in blank.

POUNDSTONE: West Virginia.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After it released its first earnings report Wednesday, the stock price of the social networking site blank dropped sharply.

POUNDSTONE: Twitter.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: New research published this week linked eating too much blank with an increase in fatal heart disease.

POUNDSTONE: This made me want to shoot myself. Sugar.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During the ceremony to celebrate Groundhog Day, New York Mayor DeBlasio accidentally blanked.

POUNDSTONE: Stepped on the groundhog.

SAGAL: No, he dropped it.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: Oh, oh, oh.

SAGAL: During their media tour of the US this week, two formerly imprisoned members of the Russian punk group Pussy Riot were blanked.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, they were dropped from the group.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week critics expressed concern that the winner on the reality TV show blank had lost too much weight.

POUNDSTONE: Oh, Biggest Loser.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in Maine...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ... responding to reports of a person screaming from a home discovered the screams were actually coming from a blank.

POUNDSTONE: A, oh, television, I don't know.

SAGAL: A male pig overjoyed to be in a pen with five sows in heat.

POUNDSTONE: Whoa.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: When the neighbor heard the screams, she was afraid a terrible fight was going on next door. She didn't realize that what she was hearing was actually one male pig's best day ever.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Paula do? I think she did quite well.

KASELL: Peter, she had six correct answers for 12 more points. She now has 14 points and she's tied with Tom for the lead.

POUNDSTONE: Oh boy.

SAGAL: OK.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So how many then does Roxanne need to win?

KASELL: Five to tie, six to win outright.

SAGAL: Roxanne, this is for the game. Here we go. Fill in the blank. New allegations emerged this week suggesting that blank knew about the lane closures that caused a massive traffic jam in New Jersey.

ROXANNE ROBERTS: Governor Chris Christie.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, CVS became the first major pharmacy chain to stop selling blank.

ROBERTS: Tobacco.

SAGAL: Cigarettes. Good enough.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Janet Yellen was sworn in on Monday morning, making her the new head of the blank.

ROBERTS: Federal Reserve.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week Mitch McConnell and John Boehner agreed that a blank reform bill was unlikely to pass this year.

ROBERTS: Immigration or debt ceiling, depending on which press conference.

SAGAL: Immigration.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Faced with a rash of burglaries, Police in Florida are providing citizens with blanks.

ROBERTS: With kazoos.

SAGAL: With signs that say no valuables here. Stay away.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Although she was not the highest scorer, a 12 week old English Sheepdog named Ginger was named the MVP at this year's blank.

ROBERTS: Puppy Bowl.

SAGAL: Puppy Bowl.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Sony announced that in order to focus on its TV sales, it would no longer be making blank.

ROBERTS: Walkmans.

SAGAL: No. They gave that up a while ago.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Computers. A robbery...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ... at a bait and tackle shop in Minnesota was thwarted when the thief was scared off by blank.

ROBERTS: By these singing talking bass - fish.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: By a big mouth Billy bass singing fish.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: When the thief broke into the Hooked on Fishing bait and tackle shop, he was on the lookout for alarms and surveillance cameras, but he wasn't expecting to be serenaded by a motion activated mechanical fish singing Take Me To the River.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, did Roxanne do well enough to win, as she loves to do?

KASELL: She needed six to win, she had six correct answers. So with 16 points, Roxanne Roberts is this week's champion.

POUNDSTONE: There it is.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Well done, Roxanne. In just a minute, to celebrate 10 years of Facebook, our panelists will predict how we will waste our time 10 years from today. But first let me tell you... Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.