By Doug Fabrizio
Salt Lake City, UT – Tuesday, we're offering a list of bizarre books for this most foolish of holidays. From fake works like the book on silence - consisting of entirely blank pages - to serious tomes with titles like "Inquiry into the Medicinal Value of the Excreta of Reptiles," our team of local booksellers has seen it all. We hope you'll join us with your own "weird book" suggestions as well.
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Children's Books: Betsy Burton, Catherine Weller, Ken Sanders
Adult Titles: Catherine Weller, Betsy Burton, Ken Sanders
Listeners' Picks
Adult Titles
Children's Books
Betsy Burton
The King's English
Knock Knock, Dial Books for Young Readers
The Encyclopedia of Immaturity: How to Never Grow Up, The Complete Guide, Klutz Press
Mouth Sounds, Fred Newman, Workman Press
Catherine Weller
Sam Weller's Zion Bookstore
Day I Swapped My Dad for Two Goldfish, Neil Gaiman
Slant Book, Peter Newell, Peter
Lawn Boy, Gary Paulsen
Ken Sanders
Ken Sanders Rare Books
Harlin Quist Books:
Number 24 Guy Billout
Millicent the Monster. Story by Mary Lystad. Pictures by Victoria Chess.
The Geranium on the Windowsill just died, but teacher You Went Right On, Albert Cullum
Just Because You're Big You think You're Right
He Was There From The Day We Moved In, Rhoda Levine & Edward Gorey
Murphy, Molly Max & Me, Albert Cullum. Pictures by Henri Galeron.
Other Children's Authors:
Edward Gorey: The Bug Book, Amphigorey and Amphogorey Too
's ABZ
Adult Books
Catherine Weller
Sam Weller's Zion Bookstore
Fiction
Bell, Michael: Scouts in Bondage: And Other Violations of Literary Propriety
Brock, Pope.: Charlatan: America's Most Dangerous Huckster, the Man who Pursued Him, and the Age of Flimflam
Clutterbuck, Henry: Lectures on Blood-letting; Delivered at the General Dispensary, Aldersgate Street
Drury, William: Norton I, Emperor of the United States: A Biography of One of America's Most Colorful Eccentrics
Ferreira, Charity: Peeps! Recipes and Crafts to Make with Your Favorite Marshmallow Treat.
Hastings, John: Inquiry into the Medicinal Value of the Excreta of Reptiles, in Phthisis and Some Other Diseases
Headquarters, I.U. Science Fiction Club: Tricks, Wicked
Headquarters, I.U. Science Fiction Club: Tricks, Dirty
Headquarters, I.U. Science Fiction Club: Tricks, Rotten
Headquarters, I.U. Science Fiction Club: Tricks, Awful
Headquarters, I.U. Science Fiction Club: Tricks, Nasty
Hogshire, Jim: You are Going to Prison
Hostess: Twinkies Cookbook: An Inventive and Unexpected Recipe Collection
Iglesisas, Chuck: Get Stuffed: 24 Projects for the Bereaved Pet Owner
Kenemore, Scott: Zen of Zombie: Better Living through the Undead
Loewen, James W: Lies Across America: What Our Historic Sites Get Wrong
Peep, Beau: What a Young Man Should Know
ReSearch Press: ReSearch #4/5
Roach, Mary: Bonk: The Curious Coupline of Science and Sex
Schnakenberg, Robert: Secret Lives of Great Authors
Smith Magazine: Not Quite What I was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Famous and Obscure Writers.
Stein, Elissa: Prom Night: The Best Night of Your Life
Voronoff, Serge: Rejuvenation by Grafting
Nonfiction
Chase, Clifford: Winkie
Evenson, Brian: Altman's Tongue
Hall, Steven: Raw Shark Texts
Knox, Tyler: Kockroach
Ruff, Matt: Bad Monkeys
Russell, Karen: St. Lucy's Home for Girls Raised by Wolves
Webster, Emma Campbell: Lost in Austen
Wood, Danielle: Rosie Little's Cautionary Tales for Girls
Betsy Burton
The King's English
Fiction
Alcott, Louisa May: More Little Women, Big Sisters Publishing LTD*
Austen, Jane: Shame and Degradation, Repression Press*
Dickens, Charles: A Tale of Three Cities, Seafarer Press*
* April Fools!
Nonfiction
Bell, Michael (ed): Scouts in Bondage and other Violations of Literary Propriety, Simon & Schuster
Cathcart, Thomas & Daniel Klein: Plato and Platypus Walk Into a Bar, Thomas Cathcart & Daniel Klein, Abrams
Groves, Eric: Butt Rot and Bottom Gas: A Glossary of Tragically Misunderstood Words, Quirk Press
Reiter, Mark and Richard Sandomir (eds): The Enlightened Bracketologist: Final Four of Everything
Robins, Harry S (editor and illustrator): Meaning of Lost Socks, Dr. Perditus Pedale, M. D. Ph. D., Frog LTD
Rose, David: They Call Me Naughty Lola, Scribner
Smith Magazine: Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six Word Memoirs by Famous and Obscure Writers, HarperPerennial
Ken Sanders
Ken Sanders Rare Books
Books as Objects
Encyclopedia Britannica. The Index. The book is devoid of pages and is hollow inside.
Salt Lake City in a Nutshell An accordion style view book of Salt Lake City with a walnut shell for its binding.
Manners and the Lack Thereof
Donleavy, J. P.: The Unexpurgated Code: A Complete Manual of Survival and Manners
Whistler, James Abbot McNeill: The Gentle Art of Making Enemies
Miniature Books
Thomas, Peter & Donna: Miniature Leaf Books. (With actual leafs from other miniature books bound in.)
Thomas, Peter & Donna: Half Dome - A Climbing History. (With colored linocut illustrations)
Thomas, Suzanne: Just Because I'm Blonde
Subverting the System
(Revenge, Getting Even, Dirty Tricks)
Hoffmann, Abbie: Steal This Book.
Hayduke, George Washington. Getting Even, Volumes One & Two
Fake Books
Albertus, Fra: Essay on Silence. (This book is completely blank)
Lindman, Wilford D.: All I Know About Plumbing, Heating and Air Conditioning. (Completely Blank)
Everything Men Know About Women (You guessed it, blank)
Canetti, N. & Sandhaus S: Count Sheep (Page after page of printed pictures of sheep)
Hoaxes, Fads, Follies, Delusions, Madness, etc.
Orson Welles and the Mercury Theatre Players: War of the Worlds
Mencken, H. L.: The Bathtub Hoax
Boese, Alex.: The Museum of Hoaxes. A History of Outrageous Pranks &
Deceptions
Mackay, Charles: Extraordinary Popular Delusions, and the Madness of Crowds
Sann, Paul: Fads, Follies and Delusions: A pictorial Story of
Madnesses, crazes and crowds phenomena
Utah: We Are A Peculiar People and so are our books
Wyman, Carolyn: Jello: The History and Mystery of America's Most Famous Dessert
Wyman, Carolyn: Spam: A Biography
Weird Religion
Ra, Summum Bonum Amen. SUMMUM Sealed, Except to the Open Mind
Swingler, David H. WWW.URIM AND THUMMIN.GOD
Weird Science, Medicine and Technology
Moray, Thomas Henry (Self published pamphlets by the author, 1920s-1930s.)
--- The Sea of Energy On Which The Earth Floats
--- Brief History of the Moray Radiant Device
--- Beyond The Light Rays
Huizenga. Cold Fusion- The Scientific Fiasco of the Century
Webster, Bruce F. The Y2K Survival Guide: Getting to, Getting Through
and Getting Past the Year 2000 Problem
Baker, Robert A.(ed.) A Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown
Japiske, Carl. (ed.) Fart Proudly Writings of Benjamin Franklin You
Never Read in School
Ellis, Arthur. The Divining Rod: A History of Water Witching.
Ellenbogen, Glenn (ed.) Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality
Parodies and Satires
Albran, Kehlog. The Profit
Harvard Lampoon. Bored of the Rings
Garson, Barbara. MacBird!
Fisher, David. Chicken Poop for the Soul: Stories to Harden the Heart and Dampen the Spirit
Van Rooten, Luis d'Antin. Mots D'Heures Gousses: The d'Antin Manuscript
Slime, R. U. Gooflumps. An Unauthorized Parody. (WARNING! Not a
Goosebumps Book.)
Fictitious Books - Dictators and Madmen
(The Little Red Book Goes On and On and On )
Quotations from Chairman Mao Tse Tung. Foreign Language Press
Quotations from Chairman LBJ. 1968. New York. Simon & Schuster
Quotations from Chairman Jesus. Compiled by David Kirk of the Emmaus Community. NY 1969
Kim Jong Il. The People's Leader. by Choe In Su. Pyongyang, Korea.
1983. Foreign Languages Press
Self Inflicted So Called Self Help Books (Pseudo Shrinkage)
Fulghum, Robert
--- What On Earth Have I Done?
--- It Was On Fire When I Lay Down On It
--- Uh Oh
--- Maybe, Maybe Not
Dyer, "Dr." Wayne Dyer: Your Erroneous Zones
Elvis
I am Elvis: A Guide to Elvis Impersonators
Poetry Gone Mad and Bad
Nimoy, Leonard. I Am Not Spock
Weird in a Wonderful Way. (Redefining what a book is)
Bateman, Edward: Gutenberg. [He took two old fashioned computer discs and put the complete text of The Odyssey, The New Testament, Tao Te Ching, The Canterbury Tales, Huckleberry Finn, A Tale of Two Cities, The Tempest, Pride and Prejudice and Hamlet onto the discs. Then he letter pressed a text narrative explaining what he had done and how the magnetic fields and iron oxide on the discs would degrade in fifty years, leaving only the letter press printed pages.]
Asimov, Isaac and Karel Capek: I, ROBOT. Three Laws of Robotics [A handmade book by Jan and Jarmila Sobota. The book itself is a miniature mechanical robot, with the text spilling out of its innards.]
Doyle, Arthur Conan. The Hound of the Baskervilles. [Sherlock Holmes' most chilling case, here presented with the text of the story printed as the teeth of the hound itself and the book a three dimensional hound's head These artist's books simply must be seen to be believed. They are too difficult to describe.
Other Music from Tom Quick's "The Best of Sublime Music, Vol 2."